Hand in hand, hug in hug, make a pair fall in love. So the body practice here I want to say something of is hugging. (Yes, I choose the hug from The Brokeback Mountain which is a perfect illustration of these two types of hug)
I have to admit that I am a hugger and I prefer to hug people in a more emotional way than a "rational" way, which both have their societal rhetoric in our everyday life.
Speaking of the emotional way, in my opinion, we usually think it as a tight close warm and maybe a long hug, by which showing the love, affection, concerns and sometimes comforts to each other. The rational hug from my view is more formal and simpler than the emotional one. I would say that most of male's hugs belong to the rational way. We usually start it with shaking hands and a one side hug (Maybe we will tap the other one's shoulders or back).
That's the traditional way, or the binary division of what hugs should be in a society, which means these two kinds of hugs make up a social construction in a real world. But here, as you can see, I choose a picture which may against the habitus with hugging, by which I mean, an emotional hug between males.
Usually we don't judge people's behavior, we just process one's intelligible body subconsciously and then make the corresponding acts. But when it comes to something that not too normal, some people will think more rather than subconsciously about the act though they will not reveal their true feelings. It never be a matter of right or wrong, the hug is just a body practice. What is behind the hug is one kind of cultures and what is behind the culture is a way of life style. You can of course stick to your guns but maybe take a generous attitude to them, unacceptable but understandable.
Hands in hands, hug in hug, every pair need to be loved. :)
I like that you chose hugging as a body practice. There is so much baggage that is attached to the hug, when is it appropriate? Where is it okay to hug? How close should I get? I think the fact that the hug has been, for so long, associated as an intimate exchange has made the same-sex hug a tricky issue. I think two men hugging has only recently made its way into the mainstream culture with the popularization of the bromance. I must admit, Chao, I am a hug kind of person too and I think the fact that we practice this says a lot about who we are, what our spacial boundaries are, and how comfortable we are about our bodies.
ReplyDeleteI also agree that choosing hugs as a body practice was a good idea. To go along with the idea of men not having emotional hugs, brings to my mind Joey and Chandler from 'Friends'. There are many episodes, too many for me to even mention, where something occurs to Joey, Chandler or some little tussle between them that results in a major bear hug between them. There was an episode when Chandler was moving out with Joey and in with Monica where they show a montage of them hugging throughout the seasons, and after they remember all these moments then end with a handshake. I think it all depends on the people on what kind of hug they participate in, since Joey and Chandler prove that two men can be best friends and always hug for the slightest of reasons.
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